That’s One Way to Piss off Your Wife: The Shitting Gold Edition
April 20, 2014
A 63-year-old man went to a hospital in Delhi earlier this month saying he had swallowed a cap from a water bottle and wanted it removed from his body. He swallowed the bottle cap because he was mad at this wife (um-ok).
Unable to ‘pass’ the cap (which never did show up on x-rays) he was scheduled for surgery. Surgeons never found the water bottle cap (he may as well said he swallowed a unicorn) but they did find 12 bars of gold each of which weighed 33 grams (worth about $23K). That was either one way to ensure his wife didn’t get the gold during their fight or it’s a bit’s more likely he was smuggling the gold to avoid the import tax. But he did have to pay one hell of an export tax because surgery probably cost him three times the amount that was in his golden belly. He totally took eat all your Karats to an entirely new level.
This story reminds me of the time I was working trauma surgery selling titanium plates and screws. A wife shot her husband in the face during a fight. The husband was getting prepped for surgery and devastated his wife wasn’t there to see him off; and, then was shocked when he was informed that she was in jail for attempting to kill him. His response, “Oh she says she’s going to kill me all the time, I told her to go ahead because she’s a horrible shot.” Lucky for both of them he was right. Ahh, love!