Ways Women Can Crush it at Work! It Involves Tossing Out CEO of AOL Tim Armstrong
January 27, 2015 #Workplace Confidence
May 21, 2014
Confidence shall we say has never been one of my problems in the workplace; and I don’t say that arrogantly, I say it assured of my abilities. What I did realize though (in hindsight) is that my own security in my abilities created insecurity in others (mainly males) causing me to become hypervigilant constantly trying to prove myself.
It wasn’t until therapy did I understand my hypervigilance stemmed from abuse at work and was actually a form of PTSD. I do not say that lightly nor do I say it without the support of a professional psychologist who worked with me for three years.
Forbes recently wrote Five Ways Women can Exude Confidence at Work but the issues are bigger than:
Wear Things that Fit
Don’t Work too Hard
Stop waiting to be rescued (FUCK THAT-and a woman wrote this article, is this 1945?) I’ve never known a woman in my business circle that was EVER waiting to be rescued.
It’s always a swell argument for someone who has none to cite the dictionary to try and validate a point (and can) is the actual word in question. She also missed that was the least of my concerns on her article. Also note that Christine Perkett “Called-out” her own comment but not one that doesn’t agree with what she’s selling. Someone might want to read about Haters vs. Forced Accountability before someone busts out a thesaurus for her next point.
That list first of all is insulting to anyone but especially to women. During what most would perceive as the height of my career at least financially (making over $250,000) I was very fit, wore clothing that fit, was good at what I did so I’ve never felt the need to “schmooze” was bossy (that’s one of the nicer words some of my insecure male counterparts used to describe me) AND I worked hard and harder because I had a uterus. And yes once during an interview I knew from a recruiter the company was worried I was at the height of “child bearing years,” so I asked the VP “Does my uterus on the table make you uncomfortable? I know it’s what’s holding me back in the Company’s mind, so let’s take it out of play for 10 years. I got the job.
— Christine Perkett (@missusP) January 26, 2015
A year later and Christine is still selling confidence let’s just hope she’s learned from last year.
I’d been in the room where male mangers would complain they just hired a woman who hadn’t disclosed she was pregnant or a female who had been with the company for years, “proven herself” and still was degraded in conversations because a sales territory could not withstand a rep missing for six weeks or longer. Yes, that is abuse. Yes, it has been reported again and again. EEOC violations for 2012 were the highest ever citing retaliation followed by race and sex discrimination.
Well, there’s at least hope she’s read this but again not too hopeful that the concept forced accountability will resonate all that well (especially on someone who Googles their own name and Calls-out their own comments).
And in case we need to be reminded Tim Armstrong, CEO of AOL outted two female employees unfairly and illegally on a company-wide conference call stating their high risk pregnancies cost the company too much money and they were the reason the company’s 401Ks would suffer. And let’s not forget that Mr. Armstrong was a repeat offender demoting a woman after her pregnancy at a previous company. We need to start Banning for Life the CEOs who overlook the rights of their employees instead of encouraging, replicating and rewarding behavior like Mr. Armstrong’s if we want women to not only exude confidence but actually BE CONFIDENT. We don’t need to Lean In we need to start Tossing Out!
Until we address and remove the problem entrenched in business: The Sociopathic Business Model™ where a company is willing to illegally overlook EEOC violations while encouraging, replicating and rewarding this illegal behavior from executives and management at the expense of the employees, it doesn’t matter what a woman wears to work, how much she exercises, or schmoozes until the workplace abuse is addressed and the offenders removed and not promoted will we see women confident in the workplace.