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Eric Holder…You Get A Car! And You Get A Car!

Eric Holder…You Get A Car! And You Get A Car!

oprah-free-car

UPDATED: September 25, 2015

Eric Holder “Resigns” as Attorney General.  Who will hold those giant Publisher Clearinghouse sized checks from Toyota, GM and Johnson & Johnson at the press conferences where “he” recovered billions now? Well, I guess he and Alex Gorsky CEO of JNJ can now take their relationship public. Great just what we need another (non-convicted) felon back out in the private sector.  My guess there’s a nice JNJ Board position waiting for him.

March 19, 2014

Toyota Motor Corp will pay a record $1.2 billion to resolve a criminal probe into safety issues, in a deal that could serve as a template for how U.S. authorities approach a similar investigation into General Motors Co.  Guess we can file this under a day late but a billion dollars in the government’s pockets.  It would be far more impressive if Mr. Holder actually stood before the American people 1. as an elected official 2. and stopped the crime before it happened.  But we’ve previously learned that the goal of white collar crime investigations (1):

The goal here isn’t so much to prevent a financial crime from occurring but to make investigations more productive,” says Mark Hilts, head of the FBI’s BAU-2, the eight-member group that is overseeing the white collar offender project. “There is no one template for what constitutes a serial killer and the same applies to the white collar world. What we try to do is look at things through the lens of the offender. ”

Wait?  There is no one template but it could serve as a template?  Anyone else confused by the inconsistent and contradictory language?  I think that double speak is a characteristic of a certain business model we’ve discussed on this site.

Why would the American people want our government to prevent crimes when all that money recovered goes to help…help…who does it help exactly?

DOJ spending over $500,000 on a  LinkedIn Profile

DOJ spent $58 million on ‘Junkets’

The settlement between the Justice Department and Toyota includes an admission by the auto manufacturer that it misled American consumers about two different problems that caused cars to accelerate even as drivers tried to slow them down. Shaving five pounds off your driver’s license photo is misleading but I’d say most people would agree that what Toyota did was lie.

The SBM with Logo final

The agreement comes as General Motors is also under investigation over its handling of an ignition switch failure linked to a dozen deaths.  And the BAU2 still thinks:

“An important part of what we do is victimology,” said Susan Kossler, a longtime BAU agent, who is working closely with Hilts on the white collar profiling project. “Looking at the victims tells you a lot about the offender.”  The FBI profilers expect to gain potentially even more insight from victims of white collar crimes because they still around to tell their side of the story. (1)

I guess it’s not important that all the victims are around to tell their side of the story. GM last month recalled more than 1.6 million vehicles 13 years after first noticing the issue. The payment Toyota agreed to marks the largest such penalty levied by the United States on an auto company, officials said.

The Sociopathic Business Model™ is likely across industries and is not a trend but rather entrenched in the American business model where billion dollar fines are just the end game.  It would be an interesting case study to find out how many employees at Toyota or GM had their EEOC rights violated because again, if a company is willing to over look the legal rights of their employees they are far more likely to engage in far greater illegal activity.

Here’s an idea:

Average cost of a Toyota is about $22,000 and if we divide that into the $1.2 billion recovered we could give 54,545 cars to Americans who need them.  Mr. Holder give us our Oprah moment and then maybe we’ll have a little more respect for an appointed official who should have caught the crime before it happened.

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